Introducing: MJ

About six months ago, around the end of May 2013, I started sleeping with my friend in an experiment of sorts. He’s lying next to me now, dozing, and this morning he came in my mouth before sending me out to get breakfast on my bike. You could say it’s going well. Anyway, he’s called Mortimer and he’s where the idea for this blog began. It was about six months ago that I discovered what I liked in the bedroom, what really got me going, and it was Mortimer who taught me. He likes to dominate me and I like to submit to him, and that is what brings me to you today.

Before Mortimer (I don’t call him Mortimer, I call him ‘Sir’) I’d had some fairly pallid sexual relationships. I had my first orgasm by my own hand at the age of 20, and had decided from my experiences with men that I was just going to have to resign enjoyment to the confines of my own bedroom…by myself. Don’t get me wrong I had some great boyfriends, all of them keen to communicate and all of them keen to please; I had some really hot nights and I did actually get close to orgasm a couple of times. However, by the time I broke up with my third boyfriend I was starting to realise that maybe close wasn’t quite good enough, perhaps I needed something a little stronger.

So, end of May 2013 I found myself at his house for dinner with some other friends and we all drank a bit too much wine. You could say I couldn’t make it home, you could say I was never going home in the first place, but I ended up in his bed with only his T-Shirt and a pair of pants on. We chatted drunkenly for a bit, got a bit closer and just before we both fell asleep he took my right nipple in his mouth and bit it. No previous sexual experience with a man could have prepared me for this moment. Nobody had ever even roughly grabbed my arse, let alone bitten me, and I had nothing to compare it to. I spent the night drifting in and out of sleep, dipping in and out of sexual dreams, completely wanton. I was back a few nights later and we delved a little deeper before Mortimer suggested outright that we start sleeping together as he believed that I’d probably enjoy the sort of things he was into. At the time my imagination strayed as far as some spanking and a bit more biting so I told him that I was in.

I can tell you now, after six months, that what Mortimer is into goes a bit beyond some spanking and a bit more biting. I have no way of measuring where I am on the scale of hardcore, and no experience to draw on, but I know for sure that I like what I’ve done and I want to learn more. I like wearing a collar and having my hands restrained behind my back, I like clamps on my nipples, being choked a bit and being thrown over Mortimer’s knee and thanking him every time he spanks me. Most of all I like being given orders and I enjoy the anticipation of the punishment if I disobey. Funnily enough, I realised that I knew I liked to take orders from Mortimer before we ever considered sleeping together. He often shows me how to do things and his voice when he is explaining things to me is like velvet; the way he gives orders and instructions send shivers up my spine.

The best introduction I had to the type of sex Mortimer enjoys was watching ‘Secretary’ starring Maggie Gyllenhaal. In it, the two lead characters recognise in each other a need that doesn’t seem to be being satisfied by day-to-day life, the need for a little control or the need to lose control. Watch it – apart from anything it really turns me on, so I can’t recommend it enough. However, unlike Lee, I can’t pinpoint the exact reason I enjoy being entirely submissive during sex, but I’m pretty sure it stems from a deep need to be in control of myself and in control of my body. Since I’ve been with Mortimer I’m relaxed, I find myself being able to give more to those around me and the study of pleasure in pain means I feel a little like I’m somewhere on my way to understanding people a bit better.

My motivation for this blog was to share what I’ve learnt. Not just my sexual adventures but what I’ve learnt about myself in the process and therefore what I’ve learnt about female sexuality. I like to think I’m getting somewhere on that topic, a subject I previously felt I was in absolutely no position to comment on. I hope it will encourage you to really think about your own sexuality and what you like without fear of judgement or criticism. Sasha Grey stresses the importance of the acceptance of the fact that what one person will really enjoy, another will find disgusting and perverted (if you don’t know who Sasha Grey is, look her up on Twitter @SashaGrey). That is what VJ and I are here for. There’s no judgement, there are no rules, there is no definition of femininity to adhere to… just bring yourself and we’ll give you us as we are.

We hope you enjoy reading about what we get up to (almost) as much as we enjoy getting up to them.

MJ